Are you aware of your choices? So often in my practice, it is apparent that many times clients are not aware of their choices. I think so often we accept a situation because it has become the normal behavior and we feel that we have loss our power to make changes. This is especially true with child abuse victims. If you have never had a voice in your life because someone took it away at a young age, it is difficult to be aware that you have a choice to make your life different. However, finding your own voice and learning to be aware of your choices is empowering.
Awareness is an important element to healing or recovery. I teach my clients mindfulness and mindfulness meditation. Some believe that mindfulness isn’t therapy but it is extremely therapeutic. I believe that teaching my client to become mindful of their choices they can become empowered to make the changes they want in their lives. Mindfulness in itself isn’t change therapy. However, if you do not become mindful, nothing will change. By becoming aware of what is going on right now, you become aware of that choices exist.
Clients become caught up in their old storylines, and cling to pass thoughts. They also struggle to fight off unpleasant thoughts and feelings that take us away from the present. They struggle to be who they feel they should be – someone without imperfections, someone perfect. Abuse survivors buried or suppressed so much and often the pain is too much so they cut, binge or purge. They are unaware of their choices because they are caught up in the negative thoughts.
Most survivors believe that something is wrong with them, that they’re worthless, undesirable, and undeserving of love. Mindfulness helps the client acknowledge the experience, become aware of the present moments experience and to accept the discomfort that arises from the experience. In mindfulness we become open to the experience without judgment rather than closing down or running away, that allows possibilities to arise.
By using mindfulness we are aware of our choices, and survivors learn to take a different stand in relation to our thoughts, emotions, physical sensations, and behaviors. By staying present with our judgment to what’s here right now is important in reducing the drama in life. It also ultimately conserves energy, time and wear and tear on our body and soul. It isn’t a quick fix. It is not goal oriented, but a process in which change becomes an option not the goal.
If you do not see any choices and you feel that your past is defining you, think about learning mindfulness and your options will open up. It takes courage to becoming mindful because it goes against what we have learned in the past and how we have coped. Mindfulness can be your path to freedom and choice. Call today for a free consultation.